Skycaptain
Poffy
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Plight
Planning.
by
Jon Dunmore © 17 Nov 2005.
BOARDING OUR FLIGHT: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen; our
Flightplan for this journey involves aircraft designer Kyle
Pratt (Jodie Foster), whose life in Europe has been jarred
to a halt by the accidental death of her husband (she swears
he "fell," not jumped), prompting her to return
to the United States with her six-year-old daughter, Julia
(a somber Marlene Lawston in her first film role). Since this
plane was designed in part by Kyle Pratt herself, we are telegraphing
that she will soon be shimmying confidently through our crawlspaces
and wreaking havoc with the avionics. For now, please observe
the safety belt signs. We should be cruising at an altitude
of suspense, coupled with paranoia.
TAXIING
FOR TAKEOFF: The night before the U.S. trip, director Robert
Schwentke purposefully blurs the line between Kyle's fantasies
and reality, for both her and us; add cutaways of her last,
oddly-mysterious moments viewing her husband's coffin before
shipment onboard this flight to the U.S. - and something
smells not quite kosher. Inflight movies will be The
Lady Vanishes and Murder On The Orient Express.
ENGINES
GUN A POWERFUL TAKEOFF: In flight, Kyle and Julia stretch
out to nap. Kyle wakes. Julia is missing. The premise is
running on maximum thrust now. Please remain calm while
the crazy lady belts about the cabin…
CRUISING
AND BRUISING: Flying high on Foster's adrenalin alone. As
Kyle's helplessness and desperation mount in her search
for her missing daughter, subsidiary characters enter the
chaos of her spiraling paranoia, all maintaining that they
never saw Kyle's daughter to begin with - Air Marshall Carson
(Peter Sarsgaard, with the deadest eyes you will see in
cinema, until the next Romero zombie-romp), the grounded
Sean Bean as the staid aircraft captain, skeptical stewardesses
(Erika Christensen and Kate Beahan among them), along with
the now-perfunctory airline trope of Mysterious Arabs, a
bevy of disgruntled extras, and the aircraft itself in the
role of Panic Room at 30,000 feet.
Systematically
shooting down search options (with all the principals exuding
gratifying "real-world" professionalism and demeanor),
the world suddenly skews under Kyle's feet when a devastating
"fact" surfaces that reveals she might, in fact,
be delusional about her daughter. Please note the location
of the emergency exits as the -
CAPTAIN
HAS TURNED ON THE SEAT BELT SIGNS: Please return to your
seat number PG-13, and ponder on a sad truth about movies
aimed at a wide demographic. Flightplan's particular
scenario faces two options - Option One would be that Kyle
is delusional (as we grimace in anticipation of a Patrick
Duffy shower-scene copout); Option Two is that her child
really is missing (bearing in mind that Hollywood hates
imperiling children, at least, not without severe retributive
action against the perpetrators - which means that even
if Julia is missing, she will be rescued, whilst
cheating a Damoclean ticking clock). Once we are made aware
of which option this movie chooses, it is simply a matter
of following the generic breadcrumbs to their Hollywood
cookie-cutter conclusion. When The Villain is revealed,
the plot - instead of thickening - is diluted.
TURBULENCE:
The Villain lapses into Bond-speak, explaining his Grand
Plan. Oh, we didn't need that at all.
UNDERCARRAIGE
IS DOWN BUT WE'RE COMING IN HARD: Movie's resolution is
telegraphed via the Villain's meticulous plotting and placement
of explosives, and via his accomplice, who is fraying at
the edges.
OXYGEN
MASKS DEPLOYED: The pat ending looms in our windshields,
invariably escalating to colossal proportions, to sate that
wide demographic spoken of earlier.
CRASH-LANDING:
The plot degenerates to B-Movie Villainy, replete with B-Movie
Convention payoff: large explosion, uplifting music, and
everything's gonna be allllright…
We've reached our destination, with stopovers in Hitchcock
and Christie. Please ensure your seats are fully forward
and that your tray tables are in the upright and locked
positions before disembarking the aircraft.
Thank
you for flying Hollywood Airlines.
END
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