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ACCEPTED
 Release: Aug 06 - Review: 2 Jul 07 
Entirely Unacceptable.
... it feels as if they’re only appearing in ACCEPTED because, like their characters, they were rejected from parts on other films.
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ACE
VENTURA PET DETECTIVE
Release: Feb 94 - Review: 19 Oct 05 
When Over-The-Top Is Under-Achieving.
Jim Carrey's second-ever leading role remains a watershed
performance of mega-ultra-outré singularity.
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ACE VENTURA: WHEN NATURE CALLS
 Release: Nov 95 - Review: 1 Dec 09
When Nature Calls Through Its Arse.
More muttonhead insanity for muttonheads. That doesn't mean this sequel isn't as bold, brash and bountifully braggadocio as its predecessor; a riotous laugh-a-minute wild kingdom zoo train...
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THE
AGONY AND THE ECSTASY
Release: 1965 - Review: 19 Oct 05
Masterpiece of a Masterpiece.
Stupendous
over-acting from both Rex Harrison and Our Man Charlton
is the saving grace of this lavish movie...
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ALI G INDAHOUSE
 Release: Mar 02 - Review: 13 Dec 09
Big Ups. And Much Sideways.
...gags that fall absolutely flat and some that fly, ALI G INDAHOUSE is an uneven potpourri of throwing everything this character has against the wall and not caring what sticks or not.
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ALIENS
Release: Jul 86 - Review: 28 Apr 08 
The Warrior/Goddess Dichotomy and the Eternal Feminine.
Cameron creates a script that bluntly screams “More is Better” – more aliens, more victims, more explosions and incredible amounts of more mucus.
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ALL ABOUT STEVE
 Release: Sep 09 - Review: 13 Feb 10
These Boots Are Made For Stalkin.'
Mary latches onto a cameraman named Steve (Bradley Cooper), who shuns her motor-mouthed advances. And then nothing happens.
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ALL
THE KING'S MEN
Release:
Sep 06 - Review: 2 Oct 06
...couldn't put this movie together again.
...this film is so exhaustingly dull,
despite its quality film-making, stupendous performances
and sober messages.
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ALL THE PRESIDENT'S MEN
Release: Apr 76 - Review: 18 Dec 09
Fall of the Imperial Presidency.
Watergate. Conspiracy. Burglary. Perjury. Courtesy of the President of the United States.
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ALONG
CAME POLLY
Release: Jan 04 - Review: 6 Jun 06
Along Came Seymour.
Hoffman uses his disheveled,
pariah character like a wrecking ball on this milky-vanilla
story.
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ALTERED STATES
Release: Dec 80 - Review: 14 Mar 09 
LSD Trip for Intelligentsia.
Eddie (William Hurt) and Arthur (Bob Balaban) are two university scientists experimenting on human regression (mentally reverting to a primitive state) using an isolation tank and sensational drugs...
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AMELIA
Release: Oct 09 - Review: 12 Feb 10
Fly girl.
...she flies, she flies, she dies. The end.
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AMERICA: FREEDOM TO FASCISM
 Release: Jun 06 - Review: 31 Aug 07 
American Dream-mare.
Income tax is illegal. It’s not a radical battle cry – it’s the Constitution. Now that you can’t un-know that fact, life is going to get real scary…
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AMERICAN GANGSTER
Release: Nov 07 - Review: 6 Jan 08 
Smooth Criminal.
Crime = glamour. Crime = hotness. Crime = smoothness.
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THE
AMERICAN PRESIDENT
Release: Nov 95 - Review: 18 Nov 06
A Romantic State of Union.
Douglas effortlessly inhabits the President's
mantle and it is a constant joy to see him imbue this
office with a power that we know the real President
does not have...
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AMERICAN PSYCHO
Release: Jan 00 - Review: 25 Apr 08
Exotic Psychotic.
This comedy is not just black - it’s black with sprinkles on top and a human head on a spike.
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AMISTAD
Release: Dec 97 - Review: 30 Oct 09
Re-educating the slaves of perception.
... one of the modern hammers to beat whitey upside the head for his past racism. No metaphors, no allegories, no analogies - this is straight up, in-ya-face, naked mea culpa racism for all the world to be ashamed at.
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ANCHORMAN:
THE LEGEND OF RON BURGUNDY
Release: Jul 04 - Review: 22 Feb 06
When The Anchorman was Man-Anchor.
ANCHORMAN ranks alongside A NIGHT AT THE ROXBURY or WAYNE'S WORLD as a stupid, stupid idea that somehow
entertains despite itself.
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ANCIENT ALIENS
Release: Apr 10 - Review: 22 May 10 
Proving you don't have to be abducted to be anal probed.
...the latest deformed baby spawned from the boomers who broke their brains on Erich von Däniken's Chariots of the Gods? book series, speculating on alien visitors to Earth bequeathing ancient peoples with advanced technology.
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ANGELS & DEMONS
Release: May 09 - Review: 31 Jan 10
Dopey Popey.
...Christians have the temerity to question how "God" can allow bad things to happen. Keep in mind these people use a CRUCIFIXION as their symbol of peace and love.
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ANY WHICH WAY YOU CAN
Release: Dec 80 - Review: 14 May 08
Any Which Way is a "Right turn, Clyde!"
There’s nothing deep here; crack a beer, strip down to your wife-beater and just enjoy it.
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APACHE
Release: 1954 - Review: 7 Aug 05
Corn-y Apache.
Yet another grandiose insult to the Native
American people.
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APOCALYPTO
Release: Dec 06 - Review: 3 Jan 07
An Epic Fable in a Jugular Vein.
MEL GIBSON'S APOCALYPTO is a
bone axe to the cervical vertebrae at the base of the
skull; jungle-wild beauty juxtaposed with bestial brutality,
exceptionally well-executed.
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APOLLO
13
Release: Jun 95 - Review: 6 Sep 05
The Greatest Successful Failure Of All Time.
...the "failure" of the Apollo
13 lunar mission aided in advancing space-faring dialect
and paved the future with skyward momentum...
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ARMAGEDDON
 Release: Jul 98 - Review: 8 Dec 08
Arma Dyin' Here.
Imagine the worst pain and suffering ever. That's how it's gonna feel at the end of the world. Coincidentally, you can feel that exact same pain and suffering by watching Michael Bay's ARMAGEDDON.
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AS GOOD AS IT GETS
Release: Dec 97 - Review: 14 Oct 09
A man-size Jack in a girl-size film.
In the film's final moments, he blindsided us with a line that only a Girly Movie can't be criminally prosecuted for, "Why can't I just have a normal girlfriend?"
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THE ASSASSINATION OF JESSE JAMES BY THE COWARD ROBERT FORD
Release: Oct 07 - Review: 29 Dec 08
The Shooting of an Olde Worlde Epic by a New World Filmmaker.
...even the wordy title itself transports us back to grainy film and honky-tonk pianos, thrusting us bodily into the grimy, wild, paranoid frontier that was romanticized beyond its harsh reality.
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AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY
Release: May 97 - Review: 16 Feb 10
Swinging. Like a man, man.
It is part spy spoof, part fish-out-of-water, all Swedish-made penis enlarger.
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AUSTRALIA
Release: Nov 08 - Review: 2 Dec 08
Epic Saddlebag Superhero.
Well, it's Baz Luhrmann, so it's gonna be stylish; it's Nicole Kidman, so it's gonna be painfully pretty; it's Hugh Jackman, so it's gonna be oozing sexual bacon like a piston on powerdrive.
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AVATAR
Release: Dec 09 - Review: 1 Jan 10
Electra Glide in Jungle Cat Blue.
Frank Zappa once said, "Writing about music is like tap dancing about architecture." And there's no way to describe James Cameron's AVATAR without a lot of tap dancing.
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THE AVIATOR
Release: Dec 04 - Review: 28 Jul 07
That Magnificent Man and His Flying Machines.
A powerful biopic of sex, insanity and aeroplanes. In any order.
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AVP:
ALIEN VS. PREDATOR
Release: Aug 04 - Review: 2 Sep 05
AVP: Audience vs. Padding.
...akin
to the nippled Batsuit – a franchise gone too far.
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AVPR: ALIENS VS. PREDATOR - REQUIEM
Release: Dec 07 - Review: 2 Oct 08
Requiem for a Dweeb.
Hundreds of Aliens. One Predator. No actors.
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