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| | HANNIBAL
Release: Feb 01 - Review: Jul 02
The Violence
Of The Hams.
Ridley Scott, the brilliant director
who helmed Alien, Blade Runner and Gladiator, fell asleep during
production and let a monkey take over.
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| | HELLBOY
Release:
Mar 04 - Review: 8 Aug 05
Hell-Freed,
but Earth-Bound.
I am as big a fan of comics/graphic
novels as the next geek-cheese, but I am a bigger fan of well-made movies, and
Hellboy, for all its glitz and glam-blammo, is not a well-made movie.
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HIGH PLAINS DRIFTER
Release: Apr 73 - Review: 21 Apr 08 
High Pains Grifter.
The Stranger from Leone’s spaghettis – reincarnated to rewrite the American West.
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| | HIGHLANDER
Release: 1986 - Review: 24 Aug 05 
It's A Kind Of
Tragic.
...this tale is so original and well-executed,
it is hard to imagine it was not culled from Scottish folk legend.
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| | HIGHLANDER
III: THE SORCERER
Release: Jan 1995 - Review: 19 Aug 05 
There Can Be Only
One
er-Three
uh- Seven? Twenty?.. I dunno, does 43 sound about right?...
Each sequel drives another vapid nail into the bottomless coffin
that has become the Highlander franchise.
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| | A
HISTORY OF VIOLENCE
Release: Oct 05 - Review: Nov 05 
When the Evil Twin
Piques.
Wearing
his Darwinism on his sleeve, director David Cronenberg assails his audience with
a movie which is surface "pulp thriller," played hard against a psychological
cyclorama...
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 | HITCH
Release: Feb 05 - Review: 4 Feb 07 
Hitch Cock.
This film needs a brain-frying dose of Tom Leykis.
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 | THE
HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
Release: Apr 05 - Review: 15 Jan 07

Mining the Diary,
Missing the Madman.
...somehow, the end result
of all these superior elements comes out as flollopy as a mattress from the swamps
of Squornshellous Zeta.
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 | THE
HOAX
Release: Apr 07 - Review: 24 May 07 
The Barbaric Yawp
of the Lunatic Fringe.
...author Clifford
Irving fooled all of the people some of the time when he produced the autobiography
of one of the world's most intriguing recluses, Howard Hughes.
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 | HOLLYWOODLAND
Release: Sep 06 - Review: 25 Oct 06 
As Powerful as
a Locomotive.
And Ben Affleck is George Reeves.
As they say in Joisey: "Who woulda thought?!" - Matt Damon's wife as
The Man of Steel!
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 | HOT
FUZZ
Release: Apr 07 - Review: 10 May 07 
Buzz Fuzz.
...does for law enforcement what Shaun did for the dead
- bring it to life just to beat the living cliché out of it.
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HOUSE
OF THE DEAD
Release: Feb 03 - Review: 23 Aug 05 
Gilligan's Island
meets Shaun Of The Dead.
...a
slasher film for the mindless and mindless at heart.
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| | HULK
Release: Jun 03 - Review: 6 Oct 05 
Shrek On Steroids.
Well, we all know what happens when Bruce Banner gets enraged:
his body turns green and his pants turn purple and very, VERY elastic.
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