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PAM AND TOMMY LEE: HARDCORE & UNCENSORED
Release: 1998 - Review: 24 Nov 09 
White Trash Circus.
Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee naked. Like we haven't seen that before.
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PAN'S LABYRINTH
Release: Jan 07 - Review: 24 Sep 09 
A wondrously grim fairy tale.
The only fairytale I can think of more gruesome is the King James Bible.
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PARANORMAL ACTIVITY
Release: Sep 09 - Review: 14 Oct 09 
Pants Not Normal Activity.
...works on the premise elucidated by Stephen King: don't show the monsters.
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PASSENGER 57
Release: Nov 92 - Review: 2 Feb 10 
Plain Plane Pain.
Wesley must use his patented Wesley Kwon Do to bring down the bad guys and the plane efficiently.
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THE
PASSION OF THE CHRIST
Release: Aug 04 - Review: 7 Apr 09 
The Bashin' of The Christ.
Yeah, this is what all those other Jesus movies have been missing - the TORTURE. If you’re gonna bash Jesus, you might as well bash him right.
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PATHS OF GLORY
Release:
Oct 57 - Review: 20 Jun 09 
Paths of Gory.
... an outraged, frustrated scream against the duplicity, mendacity, idiocy, inhumaneness and ingloriousness of war.
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 | THE
PEACEMAKER
Release: Sep 97 - Review: 18 Dec 05 
The Cheesemaker.
Meanwhile, something of world-shaking import is happening - but
in Nuclear Threat movies I can never quite scare up the interest to find out what.
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PEARL HARBOR
Release: May 01 - Review: 21 Jun 09 
Pearl Before Swine.
PEARL HARBOR digs deep below the surface of the gasoline embargoes and jingoistic fomenting and reveals exactly what this WWII conflict was all about - the love triangle between three young American Models.
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 | PEOPLE
I KNOW
Release: Apr 03 - Review: 22 Jul 06 
Who You Don't Know
Could Kill You.
Something happens after the
first hour of PEOPLE I KNOW - it gets interesting.
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A PERFECT GETAWAY
Release: Aug 09 - Review: 2 Feb 10 
Hunted Honeymoon.
...a tension-soaked thriller that ratchets suspense not unlike a junior Hitchcock or Tarantino.
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| | THE
PERFECT SCORE
Release: Jan 04 - Review: 14 Aug 05 
Plan Teen From
Outer Space.
It's the Focus Group ruling that
No Teen Model Shall Be Seen Cheating, so everyone with a hot butt comes to some
inane reconciliation with their inadequacies...
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 | A
PERFECT WORLD
Release: Nov 93 - Review: 24 Jul 06 
A Perfect Vision
of an Imperfect World.
Nature versus nurture.
Fathers versus sons. Justice versus The Law. T-bones versus tater tots.
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Release: Jul 96 - Review: 5 Jan 07 
Battlefield Iowa.
With his newfound powers, Travolta still can't find an inane excuse
to dance in this film...
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PI
Release: Jul 98 - Review: 12 Oct 08 
Uneasy as Pi.
There is something genius lurking its way to the surface in Darren Aronofsky's PI - but it gets sidetracked with hallucinatory drugs.
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PINEAPPLE EXPRESS
Release: Aug 08 - Review: 26 Jul 09 
The Fast Track to Brotherly J.
Is PINEAPPLE EXPRESS just another "bromance": two immature boy-stoners who can't forge a "real" relationship with a female, so run around holding hands, on the lam from drug dealers? Well, the "bromosexual" tag (although hilarious) doesn't do this film justice...
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PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL
Release: Jul 03 - Review: 16 Dec 09 
Shiver me fey timbers.
...as entertaining as it is ambitious, as rollicking as it is ridiculous, as boyish-action-movie as it is gender-bendingly-ambiguous.
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 | PIRATES
OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST
Release: Jun 06 - Review: 17 Jul 06 
Captain Jack will
get you high tonight...
... a hedonistic bombast
of swashbuckling high-sea hijinks, sun-seared tropical environs, intricately-designed
ocean-creature monsters and eyeliner enough to embarrass a prostitute.
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 | PIRATES
OF THE CARIBBEAN: AT WORLD'S END
Release: May 07 - Review: 16 Jun 07 
Jack-ing the Sparrow.
...the rascally diversion of the PIRATES series has turned
into a MUST-EARN overblown bombast of money-raking white noise consumerism.
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| | PLANET
OF THE APES 2001
Release: Jul 01 - Review: Aug 01 
Marky Mark's PLANET OF THE APES.
This truly IS the planet of the
apes. Taking it back is as ludicrous as a bunch of apes landing on
earth in 2001 and causing trouble with their overacting and advanced technology
and hairy anuses.
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 | PLAY
MISTY FOR ME
Release: Nov 71 - Review: 25 Aug 06 
A Legend's Misty
Origin.
In 1971, at 41, Clint Eastwood confidently
flaunts his directing debut with PLAY MISTY FOR ME - at an age when most
actors these days are contemplating which reality show to make asses of themselves
on.
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POINT BREAK
Release: Jul 91 - Review: 15 Sep 09 
Keanu and Patrick's Excellent Adventure.
POINT BREAK does actually skim along like a greased board on Hawaiian neckbreakers, never letting us out of its action grip, or its bro-tastic overacting and über-cheese one-liners.
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THE POKER CLUB
Release: Oct 08 - Review: 19 Jul 09 
Poker Haunt Us.
...the most fun you can have watching a poker movie without actually watching a poker movie.
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 | THE
PRESTIGE
Release: Oct 06 - Review: 6 Dec 06 
Nolan's Real Magic.
THE PRESTIGE is an egomaniac that criss-crosses veins of
intrigue and misdirection, pumping you breathless with half-lies and false truths
until its powerful climax.
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PRESTO
Release: Jul 08 - Review: 22 Jul 08 
Funny Hunger.
A magician, his magic top hat and his desperately cute and hungry rabbit.
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THE PROPOSAL
Release: Jun 09 - Review: 7 Nov 09 
I Do. Not.
Predictable? Check. Funny? Check. Cute little white dog named Kevin? Check. So we know what to expect from this crap going in.
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THE PROPOSITION
Release:
Feb 06 - Review: 21 Feb 09 
Brutal, Bloody, Beautiful.
THE PROPOSITION is filth and dust and blood, punishing Outback heat bleeding off the screen; a land so untamed it spawns lawmen as sociopathic as the lawbreakers they pursue.
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PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS
Release:
Dec 06 - Review: 4 Jan 07 
Dispiritying, Disheartenying,
Distressying.
...though its intent is to be
a "feel-good" movie, it goes awry in its execution, paying such sadistic
detail to every mishap, misfortune and misstep of its hero that it loses all semblance
of entertainment.
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