33 titles
#ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ
PAM AND TOMMY LEE: HARDCORE & UNCENSORED
Release: 1998 - Review: 24 Nov 09


White Trash Circus.

Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee naked. Like we haven't seen that before.
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PAN'S LABYRINTH
Release: Jan 07 - Review: 24 Sep 09

A wondrously grim fairy tale.

The only fairytale I can think of more gruesome is the King James Bible.
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PARANORMAL ACTIVITY
Release: Sep 09 - Review: 14 Oct 09

Pants Not Normal Activity
.
...works on the premise elucidated by Stephen King: don't show the monsters.
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PARANORMAL ENTITY
Release: Dec 09 - Review: 23 Aug 10


Paranormal En-titty.

I watched PARANORMAL ENTITY at night and I was not able to sleep afterwards. I was laughing that hard.
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PASSENGER 57
Release: Nov 92 - Review: 2 Feb 10

Plain Plane Pain.

Wesley must use his patented Wesley Kwon Do to bring down the bad guys and the plane efficiently.
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THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST
Release: Aug 04 - Review: 7 Apr 09


The Bashin' of The Christ.

Yeah, this is what all those other Jesus movies have been missing - the TORTURE. If you’re gonna bash Jesus, you might as well bash him right.
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PATHS OF GLORY
Release: Oct 57 - Review: 20 Jun 09

Paths of Gory.

... an outraged, frustrated scream against the duplicity, mendacity, idiocy, inhumaneness and ingloriousness of war.
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THE PEACEMAKER
Release: Sep 97 - Review: 18 Dec 05

The Cheesemaker.

Meanwhile, something of world-shaking import is happening - but in Nuclear Threat movies I can never quite scare up the interest to find out what.
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PEARL HARBOR
Release: May 01 - Review: 21 Jun 09

Pearl Before Swine.

PEARL HARBOR digs deep below the surface of the gasoline embargoes and jingoistic fomenting and reveals exactly what this WWII conflict was all about - the love triangle between three young American Models.
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PEOPLE I KNOW
Release: Apr 03 - Review: 22 Jul 06

Who You Don't Know Could Kill You.

Something happens after the first hour of PEOPLE I KNOW - it gets interesting.
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A PERFECT GETAWAY
Release: Aug 09 - Review: 2 Feb 10

Sunny, with a chance of homicide.

...a tension-soaked thriller that ratchets suspense not unlike a junior Hitchcock or Tarantino.
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THE PERFECT SCORE
Release: Jan 04 - Review: 14 Aug 05


Plan Teen From Outer Space
.
It's the Focus Group ruling that No Teen Model Shall Be Seen Cheating, so everyone with a hot butt comes to some inane reconciliation with their inadequacies...
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A PERFECT WORLD
Release: Nov 93 - Review: 24 Jul 06

A Perfect Vision of an Imperfect World.

Nature versus nurture. Fathers versus sons. Justice versus The Law. T-bones versus tater tots.
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PHENOMENON
Release: Jul 96 - Review: 5 Jan 07

Battlefield Iowa.

With his newfound powers, Travolta still can't find an inane excuse to dance in this film...
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PHILADELPHIA
Release: Dec 93 - Review: 29 Apr 10

Lawyers cutting back door deals.

This wasn't a gay character to laugh at, this was a gay character to empathize with, as it is driven home that "gays are human too" with Beckett's family, friends, his intelligence, work ethic, musical tastes and big gay loverboy...
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PI
Release: Jul 98 - Review: 12 Oct 08

Uneasy as Pi.

There is something genius lurking its way to the surface in Darren Aronofsky's PI - but it gets sidetracked with hallucinatory drugs.
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PINEAPPLE EXPRESS
Release: Aug 08 - Review: 26 Jul 09

The Fast Track to Brotherly J.

Is PINEAPPLE EXPRESS just another "bromance": two immature boy-stoners who can't forge a "real" relationship with a female, so run around holding hands, on the lam from drug dealers? Well, the "bromosexual" tag (although hilarious) doesn't do this film justice...
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PINK FLOYD: THE WALL
Release: Aug 82 - Review: 18 Apr 10

"Banging your heart against some mad bugger's wall..."

PINK FLOYD: THE WALL is the movie of the album that hit us right between the teens, embedded in the darkest crouch of our gargoyle brains.
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PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL
Release: Jul 03 - Review: 16 Dec 09

Shiver me fey timbers.

...as entertaining as it is ambitious, as rollicking as it is ridiculous, as boyish-action-movie as it is gender-bendingly-ambiguous.
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PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST
Release: Jun 06 - Review: 17 Jul 06

Captain Jack will get you high tonight...

... a hedonistic bombast of swashbuckling high-sea hijinks, sun-seared tropical environs, intricately-designed ocean-creature monsters and eyeliner enough to embarrass a prostitute.
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PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: AT WORLD'S END
Release: May 07 - Review: 16 Jun 07

Jack-ing the Sparrow.

...the rascally diversion of the PIRATES series has turned into a MUST-EARN overblown bombast of money-raking white noise consumerism.
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PLANET 51
Release: Nov 09 - Review: 21 Mar 10

He who sips from many cups, drinks from none.

...glop of as many nudge-nudge wink-wink cultural references as cartoonly possible in an uninvolving 91-minute chase movie.
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PLANET OF THE APES 2001
Release: Jul 01 - Review: Aug 01

Marky Mark's PLANET OF THE APES.

This truly IS the planet of the apes. “Taking it back” is as ludicrous as a bunch of apes landing on earth in 2001 and causing trouble with their overacting and advanced technology and hairy anuses.
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PLAY MISTY FOR ME
Release: Nov 71 - Review: 25 Aug 06

A Legend's Misty Origin.

In 1971, at 41, Clint Eastwood confidently flaunts his directing debut with PLAY MISTY FOR ME - at an age when most actors these days are contemplating which reality show to make asses of themselves on.
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POINT BREAK
Release: Jul 91 - Review: 15 Sep 09

Keanu and Patrick's Excellent Adventure.

POINT BREAK does actually skim along like a greased board on Hawaiian neckbreakers, never letting us out of its action grip, or its bro-tastic overacting and über-cheese one-liners.
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THE POKER CLUB
Release: Oct 08 - Review: 19 Jul 09

Poker Haunt Us.

...the most fun you can have watching a poker movie without actually watching a poker movie.
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THE PRESTIGE
Release: Oct 06 - Review: 6 Dec 06

Nolan's Real Magic.

THE PRESTIGE is an egomaniac that criss-crosses veins of intrigue and misdirection, pumping you breathless with half-lies and false truths until its powerful climax.
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PRESTO
Release: Jul 08 - Review: 22 Jul 08

Funny Hunger.

A magician, his magic top hat and his desperately cute and hungry rabbit.

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THE PROPOSAL
Release: Jun 09 - Review: 7 Nov 09

I Do. Not.

Predictable? Check. Funny? Check. Cute little white dog named Kevin? Check. So we know what to expect from this crap going in.
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THE PROPOSITION
Release: Feb 06 - Review: 21 Feb 09

Brutal, Bloody, Beautiful.

THE PROPOSITION is filth and dust and blood, punishing Outback heat bleeding off the screen; a land so untamed it spawns lawmen as sociopathic as the lawbreakers they pursue.
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PUBLIC ENEMIES
Release: Jul 09 - Review: 26 Mar 10

Small time crooks painted larger than the criminals in any given corporation.

An insipid telling of the fast life and crooked times of America's first Public Enemy Number 1, John Dillinger.
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PURPLE RAIN
Release: Jul 84 - Review: 9 Mar 10

Hendrix's Purple Phoenix Writ Large.

PURPLE RAIN has become a bemusing dichotomy - a dull, clichéd, formulaic storyline sprinkled liberally with the most innovative pop songs of its time.
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THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS
Release: Dec 06 - Review: 4 Jan 07

Dispiritying, Disheartenying, Distressying.

...though its intent is to be a "feel-good" movie, it goes awry in its execution, paying such sadistic detail to every mishap, misfortune and misstep of its hero that it loses all semblance of entertainment.
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