RECENT REVIEWS:
Almost daily, Poffy adds movies - old and new - to his vault of filmic fortitude.
Visit regularly for healthy teeth and toes.


 Click to see a list of upcoming reviews, old and new releases...
THE BOOK OF ELI
 Release: Jan 10 - Review: 9 Feb 10

When Gunslingers Get Religion.
In a surprising display of controlled storytelling by Gary Whitta, THE BOOK OF ELI is about religion - but it ain't religious.
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THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: PRINCE CASPIAN
 Release: May 08 - Review: 8 Feb 10

The Chronic Kills of Narnia: Prince Hasbeen.
...movie is nothing more than battle after battle, broken up by boring slow passages where people whine about Aslan the Lion (Liam Neeson) not turning up.
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TRUE CRIME
 Release: Mar 99 - Review: 7 Feb 10

The true crime is this movie's shallowness.
...has the potential to be a powerful thought experiment, exploring the psychology behind the perception of what True Crime truly is. Aside from implicit racism, no real issues are broached...
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UNDERWORLD
Release: Sep 03 - Review: 7 Feb 10

Overwrought Underworld.
Guns, Gore and Grrrrrls in growling leather.
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9
Release: Sep 09 - Review: 4 Feb 10

Sock It To Me.
... jaw-dropping, wonder-making, magnificent animation sight-spectacular, and an ambitious stab at conceptual darkness. Gone awry.
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A PERFECT GETAWAY
 Release: Aug 09 - Review: 2 Feb 10

Hunted Honeymoon.
...a tension-soaked thriller that ratchets suspense not unlike a junior Hitchcock or Tarantino.
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PASSENGER 57
Release: Nov 92 - Review: 2 Feb 10

Plain Plane Pain.
Wesley must use his patented Wesley Kwon Do to bring down the bad guys and the plane efficiently.
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ANGELS & DEMONS
Release: May 09 - Review: 31 Jan 10

Dopey Popey.
...Christians have the temerity to question how "God" can allow bad things to happen. Keep in mind these people use a CRUCIFIXION as their symbol of peace and love.
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THE INVENTION OF LYING
Release: Oct 09 - Review: 28 Jan 10

More Invention Required.
...starts as a fantastic original idea, fleshed into hilarious absurdity by Gervais, then slips in the puddle of Romantic Comedy - and you know what happens when you hit your brain on that pavement.
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FAME 2009
Release: Sep 09 - Review: 28 Jan 10

Lame.
...rushed production that flits through so many storylines and characters at the New York School of Performing Arts, it implodes with two-dimensionality.
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THE LOST WORLD 1960
 Release: Jul 60 - Review: 26 Apr 09

Stay Lost.
...definitely FOR ten-year-olds, seemingly made BY ten-year-olds.
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MULTIPLICITY
 Release: Jul 96 - Review: 24 Jan 10

Keaton's Bravura Quadriformance.
One person sells MULTIPLICITY: Michael Keaton. And Michael Keaton. And Michael Keaton. And Michael Keaton.
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I THINK I LOVE MY WIFE
Release: Mar 07 - Review: 21 Jan 10

I think I hate this movie.
Chris Rock is a powerful force. I love the guy. But in I THINK I LOVE MY WIFE, this mighty black man looks mighty beige.
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TERMINATOR SALVATION
Release: May 09 - Review: 19 Jan 10

The Manchurian Candidator.
...continually yammering about "strong hearts" delineating humans from machines and "what it means to be human" and all manner of poignant story element so obviously cribbed from Screenwriting For Dummies - and lacks everything it yammers about.
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Halloo! For my movie archives, check the Alpha Archives:
# A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

For full list of movies in order of review, visit the chronological list.
COMING SOON to Poffy's Movie Mania...
A list to remind me to finish those sketchy reviews gathering angel dust in my drawers...
  Reviews in Progress: You can click on the pics to see the unfinished/rough writings that are surfing their way to their spot on this website even as you ogle them...don't expect them to be readable, or even to make any sense - they're just scribblings. Some are so unfinished they're not even posted here... d'oh! But you can see their pretty posters... ah, promises, promises.... hope was the greatest evil in Pandora's Jar....
 
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A AUSTIN POWERS INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY Mike Myers
 ABSOLUTE POWER
ALL ABOUT STEVE Sandra Bullock   ASTRO BOY
B BATMAN FOREVER THE BIG LEBOWSKI Jeff Bridges

 BRAVEHEART Mel Gibson
 BLOOD WORK Clint Eastwood


 BIRTH OF A NATION Lillian Gish BANGKOK DANGEROUS Pawalit Mongkolpisit
C   A CLOCKWORD ORANGE Malcolm McDowell

      
D DANCES WITH WOLVES Kevin Costner
          
E THE EXORCIST Max von Sydow
          
F FATHER OF THE BRIDE Steve Martin
 FRANKENSTEIN Boris Karloff A FISH CALLED WANDA John Cleese

   FIGHT CLUB Brad Pitt
 THE FOURTH KIND Milla Jovovich
G GROSSE POINTE BLANK John Cusack
 GOODFELLAS Robert De Niro
 THE GODFATHER PART II Al Pacino
    
H THE HARD WORD Guy Pearce
A HARD DAY'S NIGHT The Beatles HOSTAGE Bruce Willis
I INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS Brad Pitt
       THE ISLAND Ewan MacGregor
J THE LOST WORLD JURASSIC PARK Jeff Goldblum

          
K            
L     LAST OF THE MOHICANS Daniel Day-Lewis
   LOVE HAPPENS Jennifer Aniston
M MR HOLLAND'S OPUS
THE ROAD WARRIOR Mel Gibson
   MYSTIC RIVER Sean Penn
 MILLION DOLLAR BABY Clint Eastwood

 MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 2 Tom Cruise
N   NINE MONTHS Hugh Grant

    
O          
P PINK FLOYD THE WALL 1982
   PLANET OF THE APES Charlton Heston
 PURPLE RAIN Prince
 THE POSTMAN Kevin Costner
  
Q            
R RED SUN Charles Bronson
 RAMBO: FIRST BLOOD PART II Sylvester Stallone


 
S

SEVEN Morgan Freeman

 SOMETHING'S GOTTA GIVE Jack Nicholson
 SIN CITY Bruce Willis
 SAVING PRIVATE RYAN Tom Hanks
 SCUM Ray Winstone
 STREETS OF FIRE Michael Pare
S THE SIXTH SENSE Bruce Willis

 SPEED Keanu Reeves

     
T   THREE KINGS George Clooney
 THE TAKING OF PELHAM 1 2 3 Walter Matthau
  
U UNBREAKABLE Bruce Willis
        
V          
W WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING Sandra Bullock
       
X          
Y            
Z
         
 

# A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


Poffy The Cucumber is copyrighted to Jon Dunmore © 2005, and the character and his name may not be used without permission.
"Poffy The Cucumber's Movie Mania" is the official website of Poffy The Cucumber © and a division of Egomania Records ®.
All movie reviews are the original work of Jon Dunmore and may not be duplicated
without permission. Plagiarism is an offense punishable by being slapped senseless with a cabbage.

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