THE JUNGLE BOOK 2016

Poffy The Cucumber

Bare Man-cessitites. Am I evil? Yes I am! Am I evil? I am Man! — Diamond Head, “Am I Evil” THE JUNGLE BOOK is “Based on the books by Rudyard Kipling,” which means it is based on the 1967 Disney cartoon. That’s all this is – the Disney cartoon remade as a CGI-animated feature. No mention of Rikki-Tikki-Tavi and Nag, … Read More

MAZE RUNNER: THE SCORCH TRIALS

Poffy The Cucumber

Out of the maze, and out of ideas. Well, there’s no maze, no scorch and no trials. Why then, is this movie called MAZE RUNNER: THE SCORCH TRIALS? This movie’s predecessor, THE MAZE RUNNER (2014), had an interesting hook – the Maze itself, which held our heroes trapped within it; the all-consuming sinister element of the story. In this sequel, … Read More

KING OF NEW YORK

Poffy The Cucumber

SCARFACE Lite, for those watching their gangster waistline. Christopher Walken is the KING OF NEW YORK. And in the movie of the same name, Walken is Frank White, a stylin’ drug overlord just outa jail, who reclaims his Manhattan territories by murdering every other would-be or wannabe dealer who moved in on his turf during his incarceration. Frank uses a … Read More

DERAILED

Poffy The Cucumber

Hitchcock Lite Meets Noir-ish Dark. Beware of goddesses offering to pay your train fare. A caveat unheeded, when the goddess in question is Jennifer Aniston. I am, after all, only a man. And, like every other full-blooded, able-membered man on earth, whenever I look at Jennifer Aniston, I can only think of One Thing: Brad Pitt. And how I’d like … Read More