“If you can get used to this feeling, you’ll be a star in Hollywood!”

Porno Politico.

DEEP THROAT – the porn movie that brought down the president of the United States. It’s the original porno referenced by no less than The Washington Post, when nicknaming their anonymous informant Deep Throat, the source that provided key details in Nixon’s Watergate Scandal of 1972. (Only in 2005 was Deep Throat revealed to be the Associate Director of the FBI at the time, Mark Felt.) The epithet is serendipitous because although Nixon was not involved in porn, he WAS a Satan’s Vagina.

The questions abound: How did a porn movie infiltrate the vernacular of politics? How did the general populace accept this reference to blowjobs so offhandedly without moral gatekeepers dogging it? How did the film name appear explicitly in mainstream newspapers without public outcry that it would scar schoolchildren?

Well, it was a different time, Movie Maniacs.

Released in 1972, DEEP THROAT is a barely watchable porn movie, displaying lackluster directorial skills, disjointed editing, brutally useless acting (which is par for the course in porn), and a surprisingly groovy soundtrack (a mix of Lalo Schifrin’s DIRTY HARRY themes and JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR, with a saucy rock organ slicing through Beethoven’s Song Of Joy). However, DEEP THROAT is more than the sleazy sex film that it is – it’s a cultural phenomenon! It was the crossover film that brought porn into the mainstream; at the time, porn was almost regarded as just another genre, as opposed to the distinctly “adult” tag that separates it from mainstream cinema these days. On a budget of $47,000, it grossed tens of millions of dollars, if not hundreds of millions (as some reports claim), and it made a star of Linda Lovelace (even though she claims sexual abuse during the filming, in retrospect). It boasts ugly actors (with many an unnecessary closeup of facial ecstasy) and the hairiest of ungroomed beavers and ballsacs (although Linda is nicely shaven, as per the fashion ten years hence!). And it’s one of those films whose production notes are more interesting and entertaining than the film itself. It would enter pop-culture immortality when Howard Simons, managing editor of The Washington Post, coined it for Watergate whistleblower Mark Felt…

Linda (Linda Lovelace aka Linda Susan Boreman) complains to a friend of hers, Helen (Dolly Sharp aka Helen Wood), that she doesn’t get turned on by sex; at least, not as much as she believes she should be. As any good whore friend would do, Helen sets up a gangbang party, for Linda to meet a nice boy and get proper fucked. After the orgy fails to ignite Linda in the way she had hoped (“bells ringin,’ dams burstin,’ bombs goin’ off”), Helen suggests visiting Dr Young (Harry Reems aka Herbert John Streicher), who examines her and discovers her clitoris is not in her vagina but rather, deep in her throat… hence, to get full satisfaction, she needs to give throat – DEEP THROAT.

Since Linda laments she has never tried this technique, as any good doctor would do, Dr Young suggests Linda practice opening her throat on his fat cock, right there in the office. See? Back in the early seventies, the American Healthcare System worked quite fast and efficiently.

So begins Linda’s journey as Dr Young’s assistant, sent on house calls in a dual quest to deep throat his patients (as therapy, we presume), and to also seek a suitable husband. As any nice girl would do.

And it wasn’t just adopted “back then” into the vernacular – the name Deep Throat is still blatantly pronounced on national TV by news anchors, in relation to Watergate, and is synonymous with informants. To think that The Washington Post adopted the name knowing it meant “blowjob” is still astounding! Could we even imagine the equivalent in any reputable publication nowadays, calling an informant Cum Ho or Gangbang Slut?… Well, no… but on the other hand, journalistic integrity nowadays is TEN TIMES WORSE… just look up any republiKKKan media and you’ll read about people stabbing children at the base of their skulls to drink adrenochrome; on mainstream right-wing sites you’ll read of people having underage sex orgies in pizza basements; the xenophobic Epoch Times will simply print agitprop about “race mixing”; at podiums around the country, republiKKKan election-deniers will rave in a fascistic gurgle about killing their opponents… yes, a simple porn movie has NOTHING on these professional mind-rapers and demagogue-sluts.

Ironically, these imbeciles and fascists and Koup Klux Klan incels… just need to get laid.

END