Poffy The Cucumber

REVIEW in need of review (of its soon-to-be lost financing, soon-to-be fired employees and cancellation policies).

I wonder if Andrew Daly realizes he is as funny as a dick rash.

Thankfully, his new TV series, REVIEW, is as painfully devoid of humor as he is, and will be gone long before my dick rash. Daly plays a “life reviewer” – someone who reviews not books or movies, but life experiences, like kicking a door in, being a racist, attending an orgy, stealing and addiction. I know what you’re thinking, “Wow, someone gave someone else some money to make this into a series?” While people with great, original ideas are starving – not in Africa, but right here in Los Angeles (cough–me, you idiots!).

Review_captionWhy is someone so devoid of character playing a character? REVIEW is structured like a follow-camera reality show, but Daly is not playing himself, rather a nerdy, socially inept tit named Forrest MacNeil (basically, himself, with the name Forrest MacNeil) who “hosts” a show where YouTubers ask him questions on how it would feel to do certain everyday things, and he performs those acts, then gives them a rating out of five stars. It’s humongously pathetic, and even whilst Daly goes through the motions with his one-trick-pony newscaster persona, he seems to be putting in only as much effort as required for a show that will be cancelled long before it finds one actual laugh amongst the morass of limp writing and Daly’s desperate stabs at improv.

Other people who benefit minimally from this short TV stint (they’ll at least get paid and have another bullet point on their résumés) are Jessica St. Clair as Forrest’s MILF wife, Kaden Gibson as the son, some douche as Forrest’s intern (who no doubt has a long career ahead of him in toothpaste commercials), and Megan Stevenson as Forrest’s blonde TV assistant, with legs shaved smoother than Taylor Lautner’s chest, who looks like she’s riding an Anal Intruder.

Episode 1 features reviews on stealing, smoking, drinking, cocaine, and going to the prom. Upcoming episodes that survive cancellation will feature further activities with the same prosaic writing and unconvincing execution that Daly will turn into desperate attempts at holding down a job as a “comedian.”

It rubs the dick rash lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again…


Review_titleREVIEW (Mar 2014) | TV-14
Director: Jefferey Blitz.
Writers: Andy Blitz, Jeffrey Blitz, Andrew Daly, Kevin Dorff, Carol Kolb, Gavin Steckler, Leo Allen, Charlie Siskel.
Starring: Andrew Daly, Jessica St. Clair, Megan Stevenson, Kaden Gibson, Tara Karsian, Jennifer Lafleur.
Word Count: 390      No. 916
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