ALICE COOPER | Pretties For You

Poffy The Cucumber

Art Before Cock. t wasn’t exactly crap. Yet Alice Cooper’s debut album, Pretties For You, was not exactly the theatrical cock-rock the group would become renowned for. Having ingested over a decade of Alice Cooper’s mainstream output (starting with Love It To Death – what I thought was their debut album), suddenly being exposed to the band’s rare, little-known first … Read More

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GAMERA VS. GUIRON

Poffy The Cucumber

A Real Cutup. GAMERA VS. GUIRON is the fifth entry in the giant turtle’s series, continuing in the dopey footsteps of his great uncle Godzilla. After a first movie introduction where he was all about wanton destruction, by now he has been re-rendered as “friend to children.” And stupidity reaches a new turtle dimension. Two young boys accidentally fly a … Read More

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GODZILLA’S REVENGE

Poffy The Cucumber

The revenge is on US! Godzilla, King Of The Monsters, takes his revenge on us by acting in GODZILLA’S REVENGE and making us watch it, instead of letting us jump out a window to make the suffering end. Longtime Godzilla filmmakers, director Ishiro Honda and writer Shin’ichi Sekizawa, try to exonerate themselves from the execrable creature fights in this film … Read More

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TRUE GRIT

Poffy The Cucumber

Flight of The Rooster. No one should go to the movies unless they believe in heroes. — John Wayne. Ironic that John Wayne should talk of heroes when his most iconic role, that of Rooster Cogburn in TRUE GRIT, is anti-hero, taking The Duke beyond his safety zone of pure-hearted, white-hatted, virginal good guy-ism and into the dark realm of … Read More

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THE VALLEY OF GWANGI

Poffy The Cucumber

That Old Black Magic Called – Dynamation. Sunday afternoon, 12 years old, television in brightly sunlit family room, ice cream with a big spoon – any wonder that this film is a cult classic, when these are the types of memories it conjures? In the old Mexican west, cowboys discover living dinosaurs in a lost valley and bring an allosaur … Read More

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