KISS | (Music From) The Elder

Jon Dunmore

A Light amongst the Dark. he most maligned album in the KISS catalog, (Music From) The Elder – is also their best by a mile! The ninth KISS studio album shifts gears so ferociously that the gearbox falls out and everyone goes through the windshield. Constructed with a solid foundation of classically heavy riffs, augmented magnificently by orchestral flourishes and … Read More

CLASH OF THE TITANS

Poffy The Cucumber

Titan-ic Kraka-lacken. Greek mythology explodes in Harryhausen splendor! CLASH OF THE TITANS is written by Beverly Cross, directed by Desmond Davis, and stars Laurence Olivier as Zeus the king of the gods, but the man whose footprint makes this adventure fantasy memorable is the king of Dynamation – Ray Harryhausen! Blank-faced Harry Hamlin stars as Perseus, son of Zeus, half … Read More

ARTHUR

Poffy The Cucumber

Little Boy Booze. The breezy, boozy tale of a wealthy enabled young man who can’t do without money – until he realizes that money can’t buy him what he really can’t do without. Back when being just a millionaire was sufficient enough to be an absolute arsehole, ARTHUR hits the screen with the impact of passing out and whacking your … Read More

OUTLAND

Poffy The Cucumber

Outland-ish. It’s HIGH NOON in space. Well, sort of. Well, not exactly. Well, not at all. HIGH NOON (1952) is about the dark side of human frailty. OUTLAND is about some space outlaws too stupid not to shoot their cowboy guns in a pressure dome. Director-writer Peter Hyams: he knows the “how” to make a film, he knows the “where” … Read More

DAS BOOT

Poffy The Cucumber

The Reich Stuff. Never has nothing happening been such compelling viewing. No debate, no discussion, no contenders – DAS BOOT is THE submarine movie for the ages. In autumn 1941, World War II U-Boat 96, crewed by young rowdy Germans, puts to sea with its veteran captain, wildly Teutonic Jürgen Prochnow, his eyes the color of eagle and high cheekbones … Read More

CHARIOTS OF FIRE

Poffy The Cucumber

The Race Between Religion and Spirit. Ah yes, running in slow motion. We’ve all done it. To Vangelis’s music from CHARIOTS OF FIRE. British film, written by Colin Welland, directed by Hugh Hudson, nominated for 7 Academy Awards, winning 4 (including Best Picture). CHARIOTS OF FIRE is based loosely on two real life British runners in the 1924 Paris Olympics, … Read More

GALLIPOLI

Poffy The Cucumber

Military Unintelligence. Peter Weir’s stirring anti-war epic, GALLIPOLI, has a heart as large as Western Australia, a sweep as wide as its blue-chiseled skies and – Mel Gibson’s naked 24-year-old bottom. GALLIPOLI is not about Gallipoli. The botched Australian and New Zealand Armed Corp (ANZAC) landing at that Turkish beach in 1915 is merely the backdrop to Weir’s wondrous character … Read More

SUPERMAN II

Poffy The Cucumber

It’s a bird. It’s plain. It’s not super, man. “KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!” Could that possibly be the cheesiest line in cinematic history? Yes. Yes, it could; most certainly aided by the level of fruitage employed by Terence Stamp as the imperious General Zod, resplendent in black, pseudo-leather, thigh-high disco boots and heavier eyeliner than Avril Lavigne. Director Richard Donner filmed … Read More