DEMONIC

Poffy The Cucumber

Next Stop: Unoriginality Central. Six Millennial friends try to contact unseen entities supposedly haunting an old house where murders were committed. Where have we heard this before? Oh, everywhere… There are a couple of interesting tidbits thrown into this mix of horror and detective thriller, but for the most part, DEMONIC has a devil of a time coming up with … Read More

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Poffy The Cucumber

Counting to Dumb. In this vacuous drama supposedly based on a true story, Old Hand (Kevin Spacey) teaches Teen Models (Kate Bosworth, Aaron Yoo, Liza Lapira, Jacob Pitts) to count cards and take on Vegas. Happens that Old Hand is college professor Micky Rosa, and his Teen Models are his students at Massachusetts Institute of Technology in Boston. I don’t … Read More

DISTURBIA

Poffy The Cucumber

Rear End Window. Alfred Hitchcock’s REAR WINDOW for Teen Models. Shia LeBeouf spends the first half of DISTURBIA stuttering his way into the panties of the girl next door; the second half, stuttering his way out of the clutches of a serial killer. Doing time on house arrest, Kale (LeBeouf) eventually turns his bored, binocular perving on the suburban neighborhood … Read More