THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN

Poffy The Cucumber

Far East becomes Old West. John Sturges remakes Akira Kurosawa’s SEVEN SAMURAI as a western, THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN. Katanas become guns, samurai become gunslingers, Far East becomes Old West. A small Mexican farming village, tired of being ransacked annually by a marauder and his henchmen, hire seven gunslingers to repel them. Soon enough, the villagers realize meeting violence with violence … Read More

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SEVEN SAMURAI

Poffy The Cucumber

The Jedi of Japan. Seven samurai against forty bandits. The bandits never stood a chance… Ultimate majesty. Ultimate tragedy. How does one describe the greatest Akira Kurosawa film, one of the most touching, savage and layered stories about sacrifice, courage and redemption, released in 1954 and still standing as one of the greatest films of all time? SEVEN SAMURAI. (Well, … Read More

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THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN 2016

Poffy The Cucumber

The Magnificent Minorities. Denzel Washington leads his black, brown, red and yellow gunslingers in cleaning up the Old West. Kinda like how black, brown, red and yellow people are still cleaning up the Modern Alt-West. In THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN, director Antoine Fuqua, praying at the altar of Kurosawa, Leone and Eastwood, crafts a majestic modern take on this paean to … Read More

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THRONE OF BLOOD

Poffy The Cucumber

Prone to Throne. In THRONE OF BLOOD, Shakespeare’s Macbeth is retold in medieval Japan; conquering armies, witch prophecies, grasping leaders and their conniving wives. Just another day in Washington. Toshiro Mifune, Takashi Shimura, Akira Kurosawa – how can any film be less than maximum overdrive with those three names onboard? (And if you are unfamiliar with those names, I’ll give … Read More

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TORA! TORA! TORA!

Poffy The Cucumber

Rising Sun over Despising Sam. Next to Viet Nam, Pearl Harbor must be one of the most shameful failures in American military history. We can understand why the American meme has been twisted into “surprise attack by the Japanese”; otherwise, how was the vaunted United States war machine caught with its pants so low around its ankles? TORA! TORA! TORA! … Read More

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