BRAM STOKER’S DRACULA

Poffy The Cucumber

Delicious, with a hint of sour Keanu. In BRAM STOKER’S DRACULA, Gary Oldman shows us what acting IS and Keanu Reeves shows us what acting ISN’T. We all know the concept of Dracula; it is in our – ahem – bloodstreams, but in cinema, we rarely see Dracula’s origins. Director Francis Ford Coppolla opens the movie with the event that … Read More

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DRACULA

Poffy The Cucumber

Evil’s Fruity Face. DRACULA is a mediocre 1931 movie, but the concept of the undead, blood-craving supernatural demon is so mythically instilled in the planet’s – ahem – bloodstream that this movie’s ongoing mighty aura is more due to the CONCEPT of the vampire entrenched in society’s psyche than any movie-making quality the film-makers might have aspired to. It was … Read More

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DRACULA: DEAD AND LOVING IT

Poffy The Cucumber

Frightfully Fangless. In DRACULA: DEAD AND LOVING IT, Leslie Nielsen is the vampire Count Dracula. We presume this retelling of Bram Stoker‘s tale is a comedy. We presume wrong, as writer-director Mel Brooks steers it as far from funny as Disneyland is from Transylvania. One would imagine the comic radar of the genius auteur who helmed BLAZING SADDLES, HISTORY OF … Read More

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