ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD

Poffy The Cucumber

A film that takes us somewhere, yet goes nowhere. Quentin Tarantino once again brazenly rewrites history in his scintillating homage to La La Land of the 1960s, ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD. Hollywood 1969. Two tales intertwine – one, a tale of an actor and his stuntman, hustling for work in a business that has moved past their cowboy … Read More

NIKKI GLASER: BANGIN’

Poffy The Cucumber

Doing the Schumer Shimmy. What a slut! I’m 12 minutes into Nikki Glaser’s standup Special and she is still talking about blowjobs. It stopped being funny around the 2nd minute. Nikki Glaser’s second standup Special, BANGIN’ (her first for Netflix), filmed at The Academy in Los Angeles, is 1 hour and 3 minutes of incessant chatter and zero content. I … Read More

DAVE CHAPPELLE: STICKS & STONES

Poffy The Cucumber

Breaking Bones. I was dreamin’ when I wrote this, forgive me if it goes astray But when I woke up this mornin’ could’ve sworn it was Judgment Day. The sky was all purple, there were people runnin’ everywhere Tryin’ to run from the destruction, you know I didn’t even care… — “1999,” Prince. Dave Chappelle calls the world a bunch … Read More

YESTERDAY 2019

Poffy The Cucumber

Scrambled Eggs. Imagine there’s no rom-coms… When a struggling musician wakes up in a world where The Beatles no longer exist – and he is the only one that remembers them – he cashes in by “writing” their songs and rising to superstardom. YESTERDAY takes many interesting turns, and one gigantic stupid one. Jack (Himesh Patel) is an instantly-likeable loser; … Read More

AZIZ ANSARI: RIGHT NOW

Poffy The Cucumber

Fuck that bitch! Aziz Ansari, in his first standup Special since he was falsely accused of sexual assault on a date gone awry, should have opened his show with, “Fuck that bitch!” Because his comedy has been ruined by the accusation of that anonymous cunt! A year after the furor, he’s back on stage in AZIZ ANSARI: RIGHT NOW, but … Read More

THE DIRT 2019

Poffy The Cucumber

THE DIRT – is a load of CRAP! Maybe a quarter of it happened, and not like this… — Logan, LOGAN. THE DIRT opens with a title card: “This story is true.” Fuck off. In this paean to rock band Mötley Crüe (remember when umlauts made everything evil?), every detail, every anecdote, every song and character and drug-fueled escapade is … Read More

ADAM SANDLER: 100% FRESH

Poffy The Cucumber

Fresh – if you’re 12. Adam Sandler used to be a funny standup comedian. I used to love that unsure persona, and the sudden left turns in his gags. This was way back before most of you Adam Sandler fans were Adam Sandler fans (circa 1990). Then came SNL (1990-1995), and numerous movies, some good, most bad; a handful of … Read More

THE BELLBOY

Poffy The Cucumber

Catching Charlie. Jerry Lewis at last pulls even with one of his heroes – the great Charles Chaplin – as he fulfills all the roles that Charlie used to fill in his movies: writer, director, producer, editor, star. And SILENT. THE BELLBOY is a triumph for Jerry Lewis – in all the disciplines cited above. Though he had worn various … Read More

VISIT TO A SMALL PLANET

Poffy The Cucumber

The Shrinking of Gore’s PLANET. There are parts in VISIT TO A SMALL PLANET where Jerry Lewis astounds us with his physical art, yet that is not enough to save this attempted comedy from an atrocious script that exudes astronomical ignorance, and by that I mean: ignorance in astronomy… or maybe, also…? Jerry is Kreton, from an alien race that … Read More

THE GEISHA BOY

Poffy The Cucumber

Jerry finds Charlie. Jerry Lewis channels Charlie Chaplin in GEISHA BOY, his very own homage to Chaplin’s classic, THE KID. Not only does Jerry find his footing with a finely-tuned balance between drama and comedy – something he was striving for in his last three solo pictures – he also stops being racist! (Since his second film in 1950, Jerry … Read More

ROCK-A-BYE BABY

Poffy The Cucumber

When the bough breaks… Jerry Lewis tries to fulfill the roles of both Dean Martin AND Jerry Lewis in this lurid tale of deceit and obsession disguised as family farce, where an unwed Hollywood starlet secretly leaves her new triplets in the care of her childhood sweetheart in a small town, to avoid scandal. The highest hurdle for 1958’s ROCK-A-BYE … Read More

HORNS

Poffy The Cucumber

Harry Potter and the Horns of Dilemma. Soon after the mysterious death of his girlfriend, Ig Perrish wakes to find two horns growing out of his forehead. He realizes people are revealing their innermost secrets to him, and Ig figures it must be due to the horns, which no one gives any undue notice. He realizes he can use this … Read More

THE SAD SACK 1957

Poffy The Cucumber

Sad. THE SAD SACK is Private Meredith Bixby (Jerry Lewis), an inept dogsbody who is, for his mechanical skill, given the chance to succeed in the military by a female major, who orders another Private to surreptitiously shepherd Bixby through adversities, such as everyday life in the military. The title might imply someone moping around like a killjoy – which … Read More

LOOK WHO’S BACK

Poffy The Cucumber

Mein Komödie Kampf. What if Hitler came back in the YouTube age? With modern media at his fingertips, how might Adolf Hitler’s nationalist-socialist message be received? And with most media-drenched dunderheads trigger-ready to follow demagogues, would history repeat itself on a much quicker, more efficient scale? Conversely, if such a charismatic person ever appeared on our clickbait stages, COULD we … Read More

THE DELICATE DELINQUENT

Poffy The Cucumber

The Kid Flies Solo! In his first movie without Dean Martin, THE DELICATE DELINQUENT, Jerry Lewis is a youth mistaken for a gang member, taken under the wing of a mentor cop… Time for the public to find out whether The Kid was all he was cracked up to be, or merely one half of a defunct team that needed … Read More

HOLLYWOOD OR BUST

Poffy The Cucumber

A Road Movie for the End Of The Road. Dean walked one way, I walked the other, and we never saw each other again. — Jerry Lewis, on the final Martin and Lewis show at the Copacabana New York, 1956. Way back in their second film, MY FRIEND IRMA GOES WEST (Jul 1950), Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis boarded a … Read More

ARTISTS AND MODELS

Poffy The Cucumber

Comics and comicbooks, cultures and vultures. Colors scream louder than Jerry Lewis dreaming about Vincent the Vulture, catchy songs and willing dames, snappy writing and vivid characters careen at us in this 14th Martin and Lewis musical-comedy farce, ARTISTS AND MODELS. Out-of-work cartoonist Rick Todd (Dean Martin) and unemployed writer Eugene Fullstack (Jerry Lewis) moved to New York City to … Read More

MONEY FROM HOME

Poffy The Cucumber

Martin and Lewis on the money! Honey-Talk Nelson (Dean Martin) is in deep to the mob. To make good on his debt, he is ordered to “fix” a horserace so that the favorite loses. He enlists the aid of his innocent veterinarian cousin Virgil (Jerry Lewis) to dope the favorite, but then falls for the horse’s owner, whilst Virgil falls … Read More

SAILOR BEWARE

Poffy The Cucumber

Kissed Off. Probably the stoopidest Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis musical-comedy, SAILOR BEWARE is about two pals enlisting in the Navy and getting involved in a kissing contest that somehow gives one of them the reputation of a Lothario – even though he is allergic to kissing women. Then it ends before it gets mistaken for a movie. After an … Read More

MY FRIEND IRMA GOES WEST

Poffy The Cucumber

B-characters Bedazzle in B-movie. Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis once again make a B-movie watchable. But only just. In MY FRIEND IRMA GOES WEST, the gang from the first IRMA aim for Hollywood, end up in Las Vegas, and are still barely watchable. Honestly, I don’t know why Paramount Studios insisted on a sequel to the execrable MY FRIEND IRMA … Read More