HELEN OF TROY

Poffy The Cucumber

Jane of Troy. Well, we’ve got to give it points for excess epicness. It can’t be easy to scare up a cast of thousands and get them all to walk in one direction at the same time. We’re talking planning maximus. Unfortunately, HELEN OF TROY comes off as all planning, no maximus. Sexyboy Paris of Troy (Jack Sernas) steals away … Read More

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NINE HOURS TO RAMA

Poffy The Cucumber

The Dark Side of the Horst. I see a red door and I want it painted black. –The Rolling Stones, “Paint It Black” No, it’s not a movie about Arthur C. Clarke’s enigmatic alien space station, Rendezvous With Rama, but about the assassination of Mohandas K. Gandhi (aka Mahatma Gandhi) on January 30, 1948, and his alleged last utterance upon … Read More

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MOBY DICK

Poffy The Cucumber

Taming the Beast of Man. Call me Moby. Some years ago – never mind how long precisely – I thought I would swim about and see the watery part of the world. So there I am, big white sperm whale, enjoying the ocean green, going about my whaley business, when along comes Cap’n Ahab and harpoons me! Without so much … Read More

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THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY

Poffy The Cucumber

Masterpiece of a Masterpiece. Stupendous over-acting from both Rex Harrison and Our Man Charlton is the saving grace of director Carol Reed‘s lavish THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY, which threatens to bog itself sermonizing over religion and art, set in an epoch seemingly dominated by both, The Renaissance. Adapted from a slice of Irving Stone‘s book of the same name, … Read More

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