THE INVITATION 2015

Poffy The Cucumber

If this is dinner, I can’t wait for dessert. THE INVITATION is a coiled spring that explodes in your face just when you think it’s safe to leave the party unscathed. Like the classic ROSEMARY’S BABY, or the recent THE RITUAL, the buildup of tension in what should be a common social setting ratchets THE INVITATION to its whiplash conclusion. … Read More

THE FOUNDER 2016

Poffy The Cucumber

The Ham-Burglar. THE FOUNDER, the story of how Ray Kroc stole the McDonald’s brand out from under its actual founders and turned it into the biggest fast food chain on the globe, is simultaneously inspiring and horrifying – like a meal from McDonald’s. Written by Robert Siegel (based on the amazing true story) and directed like a lean burger by … Read More

TED 2

Poffy The Cucumber

Teddy Fuxspin. That dirt-talkin’ beer-drinkin’ pot-smokin’ bad boy bear is back in TED 2 – badder, bolder, drunker and… seriouser? Seth MacFarlane makes the sequel to his R-rated TED (2012) even more R-rated. My biggest fear with this followup to the highest-grossing R-rated comedy ever was that the studio would castrate raconteur MacFarlane; that someone would wear him down with … Read More

PAUL

Poffy The Cucumber

Kind Encounters of the Close Third. It’s a buddy comedy of the crude kind, a road movie of the chase kind, a close encounter of the third kind! Hey, isn’t that Roger from AMERICAN DAD? Or do all aliens just look alike to me?… Two Brits on a pilgrimage to famed UFO sites in Nevada pick up a real extraterrestrial … Read More

SHUTTER ISLAND

Poffy The Cucumber

Just dropped in – to see what condition my condition was in… The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven. –John Milton, Paradise Lost. What a beautiful, sophisticated, mind-leveling thriller! SHUTTER ISLAND is not “scary,” but creepy, disturbing and filled with enough tension and intrigue to drown a plush … Read More

LOVE HAPPENS

Poffy The Cucumber

Shit Happens. Two blond white American upper-class people fall in love. Through all the adversity of being blond and white and American. Who coulda seen that coming? Florist Eloise (Jennifer Aniston, in continuance from ROCK STAR) and self-help guru Burke (Aaron Eckhart, in continuance from THANK YOU FOR SMOKING) Meet Cute while Burke is touring Seattle giving self-help seminars. And “love” … Read More

VOLCANO

Poffy The Cucumber

You Maniacs! You blew it up! VOLCANO is nothing but fun fun fun, seeing the city of my residence – Los Angeles, California – the city that has given me nothing but attitude attitude attitude being blown all to hell. Tommy Lee Jones is the head of the Department for Fixin’ Stuff and Anne Heche is a geologist. In the … Read More

GRAN TORINO

Poffy The Cucumber

The Enforcer in the ‘burbs. It’s not a Dirty Harry film… But someone forgot to tell Clint Eastwood. Clint Eastwood carries around so much Legend with him that no matter how he approaches a character, we view him through the prism of his inimitable Avenger archetypes. He was Dirty Harry in only five of his nearly 60 starring films (DIRTY … Read More