BLADE RUNNER

Poffy The Cucumber

Incompetent Killer of Incompetent Killers. He’s a BLADE RUNNER. He hunts Replicants – robots that resemble humans. And he’s terrible at his job. Deckard (Harrison Ford) is regarded as the indomitable hero of BLADE RUNNER, especially since his captain (M. Emmett Walsh) pulls him out of retirement to do a job that his best officer failed at doing – “retire” … Read More

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YOUTH IN REVOLT

Poffy The Cucumber

A dweeb by any other name… In YOUTH IN REVOLT, ill-defined characters populate a trailer trash landscape, with dialogue trying way too hard to be JUNO. Even Michael Cera is sick of how dweeby he is. He’s willowy Nick Twisp, who invents an alter-ego to be able to find the audacity to break his virginity with the girl of his dreams, … Read More

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CHRISTMAS WITH THE KRANKS

Poffy The Cucumber

Dreaming of a Fight Christmas. CHRISTMAS WITH THE KRANKS is about selfishness, viciousness, hypocrisy and homogeneity – you know, the true spirit of Christmas. From a John Grisham novel, Skipping Christmas (which I presume is as compelling as his other books – and therefore nowhere near as asinine as this movie), KRANKS is about middle-aged upper-class couple Luther and Nora … Read More

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ROMEO AND JULIET 1996

Poffy The Cucumber

More Comedie Than Tragedie. All I’m saying is: Leonardo DiCaprio should stop being prettier than his female co-stars. In ROMEO + JULIET, snub-nosed Claire Danes bravely steps up to out-femme Leo’s manly prettiness. And fails. Leonardo is Romeo (kinda archly poetic, no?) and Claire is his Juliet. Shakespeare‘s retelling of Ovid’s Pyramus and Thisbe is retold with creative conceptualizing and … Read More

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