ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER

Poffy The Cucumber

Cutting Bloody Political Comedy. ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER is a film about the blood-drinking creatures of the night, the hellish, undead demon-spawn that crave the annihilation of the human species – that’s right, it’s about Republicans. Ironic then, that the hunter of these bloodsuckers is none other than the most famous Republican, Abraham Lincoln – fighting to free the world … Read More

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A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD

Poffy The Cucumber

Double the McClane, Triple the Explosions, One Wisecrack Too Many. A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD starts with a drum solo– I mean, car chase. Car chases are, after all, the drum solos of movies. To make it more interesting than other drum solos out there today, director John Moore (padawan to John Woo, judging by the amount of mayhem) … Read More

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LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD

Poffy The Cucumber

In Bruce We Trust. Never trust a computer you can’t throw out your window. – Steve “Woz” Wozniak. This mess is not his fault; he’d rather be home with a cold one; he’s no superman, just an average guy who must act like a super man – and I think he’s wearing the same sweaty shirt from DIE HARD (1988). … Read More

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SKY HIGH

Poffy The Cucumber

The Bastard Offspring of John Hughes and Joel Schumacher. Recall, if you are secure enough in your manhood, those John Hughes films of the mid-80s: perturbed teens discovering themselves blah blah. Further recall, if you dare, the BATMAN franchise under the frivolous wrist of Joel Schumacher: all coruscating color and comic-book éclat. If you’ve an appetite for distraction (and a … Read More

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