TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES 2014

Poffy The Cucumber

Shelling to a new generation. TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES have been around as a merchandising product forever! In a long list of TMNT comicbooks, cartoons and movies, this 2014 reboot is the latest iteration and definitely the turtliest. Four ninja mutant turtle teenagers (“Well, when you put it like that, it sounds ridiculous!”) must stop a bladed samurai criminal intent … Read More

THE DICTATOR

Poffy The Cucumber

For To Make Democratize in America. In the grand tradition of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad visiting Columbia University in 2007 and denying the Holocaust, claiming Iran has no gays and lets women roam free with equal rights, so too is Wadiya’s dictator Hafez Aladeen, granted all courtesies when visiting the United Nations to extol the virtues of his oppressive Middle … Read More

THIS IS 40

Poffy The Cucumber

This is Soporific. Writer-director Judd Apatow’s “sorta sequel to KNOCKED UP” is sorta not as good as KNOCKED UP. THIS IS 40 shows us how boringly randomly arbitrarily mundane and unnecessarily complex life over 40 becomes. Like anyone under 40 will care, and like anyone over 40 will care less. Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann (Apatow’s real life wife) play … Read More

TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN

Poffy The Cucumber

The PC-vs-Mac wars escalate. Well, what did you expect? If there is such a thing as “too many effects,” this movie has too many effects for TEN movies. Effects effects effects, for the love of God, effects. Just for the sake of effects. And then for the love of God, more effects. Stir. Vomit. Michael Bay directs TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF … Read More

TRANSFORMERS

Poffy The Cucumber

More Than Meets The Eye-Strain. The CGI prowess in the movie TRANSFORMERS almost makes us forget that this film is for people who still play with action figures. Directed by Michael Bay and his motion-sickness cameras, this overwrought production revolves around the All Spark, a mechanical-mystical cube that has knotted the steel knickers of two races of giant robots engaged … Read More