THE MAIDEN HEIST

Poffy The Cucumber

The Passion of The Heist. A quaint little heist comedy, with a nifty romantic resolution, THE MAIDEN HEIST stars Morgan Freeman, Christopher Walken and William H. Macy as security guards at a Boston art museum, so enamored with certain art pieces that when those pieces are sold to a European museum, they decide to steal the pieces for themselves and … Read More

ZOOM

Poffy The Cucumber

Dumber Than a Speeding Bullet. This movie made me weep with emotion. I had no idea a movie could be THIS FREAKIN’ BAD. Oh, of course – Chevy Chase is in it. ‘Nuff said. Tim Allen is retired superhero Zoom (think: The Flash as a doughy guy), called back into service by the secret government agency (aren’t they all?) that … Read More

GARFIELD

Poffy The Cucumber

Flat Cat. Although Bill Murray (who voices Garfield) is truly a real-life simulacrum of the smug, under-enthused comic-strip cat, his intrinsically entertaining “character” was – dare I say it? – Lost In Translation (shout, but don’t hit) somewhere between the vapidity of the script and the orange computer blips representing the eponymous feline in GARFIELD. Garfield’s master, Jon (Blandness, thy … Read More