MOVIE 43

Poffy The Cucumber

Disgusting Inappropriate Filthy Hilarious Hellspawn Godsend. Specifically designed to make you call your Congressman and complain, MOVIE 43 will offend, distress, embarrass, infuriate, ejaculate, and give you anal warts. Not your average ensemble cast movie where everyone is trying to be more serious than their peers in order to win that Golden Globe, MOVIE 43 takes its A-Listers, jams them … Read More

THE MOTHMAN PROPHECIES

Poffy The Cucumber

Of gods and mothmen. Big moth. Big mystery! THE MOTHMAN PROPHECIES is a well-directed, original psychological thriller about a stranger (Richard Gere) in a small town who is driven almost mad with disembodied voices warning of danger, all the while hearing tales around town from reputable witnesses, of an eight-foot tall “Mothman” that could somehow be connected to the prophecies. … Read More

PRETTY WOMAN

Poffy The Cucumber

For the Love of Prostitution. Julia Roberts is a classless whore who gets lucky by bedding a millionaire. And in PRETTY WOMAN, Julia Roberts is a classless whore who gets lucky by bedding a millionaire. In what may be the most ignorant movie in a decade, a businessman hires a Hollywood Boulevard hooker (renowned for their trashiness, tastelessness, uncleanliness, tardiness … Read More

AMELIA

Poffy The Cucumber

Fly Girl. By no means boring, but by no means compelling either. Amelia Earhart’s life might have been one of wonder and adventure and romance, but in the movie AMELIA, well, she flies, she flies, she dies. The end. Hilary Swank is Amelia Earhart, a true America’s Sweetheart for her aviation feats in the late 1920s, who attempted to circumnavigate … Read More

THE HOAX

Poffy The Cucumber

The Barbaric Yawp of the Lunatic Fringe. In 1970, author Clifford Irving fooled all of the people some of the time when he produced the autobiography of one of the world’s most intriguing recluses, Howard Hughes. Like all great hoaxes, it eventually served him better than the truth. And like all movies “based on true stories,” we approach cautiously where … Read More

INTERSECTION

Poffy The Cucumber

Gere Up For Double The Love. Whadaya know: if you’re skidding headlong into a death-tastic car accident, and you happen to be Richard Gere, your life does flash before your eyes – well, your love life, at least. If you’re Richard Gere. INTERSECTION is almost a Chick-Flick version of MEMENTO, as Vincent (Gere) reminiscences back through his life of juggling … Read More