AVENGERS: ENDGAME

Poffy The Cucumber

Deus ex Marvela. The Elevator Pitch: “Think: BACK TO THE FUTURE meets STAR TREK IV – the Avengers travel back in time, to retrieve these McGuffins in the past that will fix things in the present.” And producer Kevin Feige asked, “Can it be wacky, like in BACK TO THE FUTURE where they’re sneaking around their past selves and suddenly … Read More

ALL IS LOST

Poffy The Cucumber

Man versus Ocean in a battle to the wet. In the grand tradition of single-actor movies, ALL IS LOST fearlessly gives us Robert Redford (credited simply as Our Man) alone onscreen for the whole movie, an intrepid sailor, adrift on a boundless ocean after his yacht sinks, battling some fresh hell every moment to stay alive. Our Man wakes on … Read More

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER

Poffy The Cucumber

Flying High on Red White and Hooey. While the fate of the world teeters over the maw of the military industrial complex, while terrorism is exploited to stultify freedom, while despotic oligarchy comes waving the flag of democracy, Captain America returns to punch things. CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER finds Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) aka Captain America growing up fast. … Read More

THE CONSPIRATOR

Poffy The Cucumber

The SYSTEM is the conspiracy! We’re gonna put the SYSTEM on trial! — Jim Carrey, THE CABLE GUY. If you were wondering why director Robert Redford would re-litigate Abraham Lincoln’s assassination on film (how many times can they sink the Titanic, right?), then defer to Redford’s rationale: “It’s a story that no one knows about, connected to a story that … Read More

A CIVIL ACTION

Poffy The Cucumber

Justice IS blind – so can’t see Truth. In movies, the good guys always seem to win court cases. Over an ingratiating orchestra swell, no less. But in reality, good or bad has nothing to do with the outcome of court cases. It’s how you play the game. If you can afford to be in the game in the first … Read More

ALL THE PRESIDENT’S MEN

Poffy The Cucumber

Fall of the Imperial Presidency. Watergate. Conspiracy. Burglary. Perjury. Courtesy of the 37th President of the United States. Over the years, I’ve called Richard Milhous Nixon a “hellspawn from Satan’s own vagina”… and I see no reason to stop. ALL THE PRESIDENT’S MEN is a powerful recount of specifically one event in Satan’s Vagina’s presidency that would define not just … Read More

LIONS FOR LAMBS

Poffy The Cucumber

Roaring Thunder for Republican Muttonheads. Lest we forget: Robert Redford once brought down Satan Nixon in ALL THE PRESIDENT’S MEN; in LIONS FOR LAMBS, he goes for the neck-wattle of Demon W. Bush. Razor-sharp writing, controlled direction, magnificent performances, LIONS FOR LAMBS is a wake up call to America – wake up and smell the lunatic euphemisms the Republican administration … Read More

THE LAST CASTLE

Poffy The Cucumber

Farcical Castle. THE LAST CASTLE was a good movie…until it got stupid. Then it was a stupid movie… until it got pillow-fartingly ridiculous. A military prison. Warden: Tony Soprano. New inmate: highly respected and profusely-decorated 3-star general Robert Redford. Theme: Battle Theorist (Tony, who sports a collection of battle memorabilia, weapons, literature) versus Battle Veteran (Redford, whose field credits include … Read More