THE LEGEND OF HERCULES

Poffy The Cucumber

Homer meets Chippendale’s. The movie 300 had rough dungeon sex with GLADIATOR and they had a dim-witted child called THE LEGEND OF HERCULES. Kellan Lutz (TWILIGHT saga) co-stars with his expressionless face as Hercules, the son of Zeus and a mortal woman, who would become a slave. The slave who became a gladiator. The gladiator who defied an empire—wait, uh… … Read More

CONAN THE BARBARIAN 2011

Poffy The Cucumber

Muscles, magic, tits and blood. Just how much blood can spurt out of a human body when it’s slashed with a sword? Seems like you could fill a good-sized mopping bucket… CONAN THE BARBARIAN adheres dutifully to the sword and sorcery flow chart: big-chested Hero, big-chested Damsel, magical Villain seeking unlimited power; sword fights, quest for vengeance, damsel in distress, … Read More