TIN MAN 2007

Poffy The Cucumber

Choking on the Yellow Thick Chode. Honestly, I don’t know how Zooey Deschanel continues to get work. In TIN MAN, a re-visioning of L. Frank Baum’s THE WIZARD OF OZ, Zooey is ersatz Dorothy, named DG (oh, that’s soo street-cred!), lost in the magical world of O.Z. (the Outer Zone – oooh! That’s even more street!), and aided by three … Read More

OUR IDIOT BROTHER

Poffy The Cucumber

Our Idiot Movie.  A gentle, gullible soul causes problems for his three sisters with his big mouth. OUR IDIOT BROTHER is Paul Rudd. Busted for selling dope to a police officer (who was in uniform and asking for dope), Ned (Rudd) has just exited jail, with no job and nowhere to live, so juggles his time between his three sisters, … Read More

YOUR HIGHNESS

Poffy The Cucumber

Their Lowness. The trailers fooled us with witty asides and raunchy innuendo, but YOUR HIGHNESS is a fast-paced slow-brainer for people who like to hear swear words unsurrounded by actual comedy. Not only sophomoric – uninvolving and uncomfortably devoid of laughs, with sloppy, predictable writing, direction and story; Danny McBride at his unfunniest as a slacker prince; James Franco as … Read More

YES MAN

Poffy The Cucumber

YES means Mo.’ In YES MAN, anti-social Carl (Jim Carrey) has been sinking lower into negativity since leaving his girl, Stephanie (Molly Sims), making dumb excuses not to attend any social events with his friends, turning down loan applications at his job, saying ‘no’ to life in general, spending every night blankly watching DVDs in his apartment. Kinda like you’re … Read More

THE NEW GUY

Poffy The Cucumber

Once a Dork… So I’m totally writers-blocked one night while trying to finish my script, SHIFTER. And I’m channel-surfing cable, my mind a blank, settling in to a long night of unproductivity, wondering fearfully – like everyone who experiences the steel wall of Writer’s Block – how I’ll ever be able to string words together again, when suddenly – THE … Read More

THE ASSASSINATION OF JESSE JAMES BY THE COWARD ROBERT FORD

Poffy The Cucumber

The Shooting of an Olde Worlde Epic by a New World Filmmaker. This classical western draws us into 1800s Americana so richly that we feel our teeth rotting from lack of dentistry not invented yet. Written and directed by Andrew Dominik (from a book by Ron Hansen), THE ASSASSINATION OF JESSE JAMES BY THE COWARD ROBERT FORD is a study … Read More

THE HAPPENING

Poffy The Cucumber

Nothing Happening. M. Night Shyamalan is a film-making genius. Okay, that’s outa the way, now to THE HAPPENING – one of M. Night Shyamalan’s best comedies. (Because if you don’t laugh at Zooey Deschanel’s “indicating” method of “acting” you must attend the same inept acting classes she does.) In M. Night Shyamalan’s latest producer-writer-director effort, people of the U.S. Eastern … Read More

SURF’S UP

Poffy The Cucumber

SURF’S UP, Up and Away. Despite its mundane title, SURF’S UP is a totally tubular surfari of relentless comedy and madboy cuteness. I guess the world having accepted penguins unto its bosom (MARCH OF THE PENGUINS, 2005, MADAGASCAR, 2005, HAPPY FEET, 2006 – to say nothing of BATMAN RETURNS, 1992, or those CROCODILE HUNTER episodes; and then there are those … Read More

THE HITCHHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY

Poffy The Cucumber

Mining the Diary, Missing the Madman. Douglas Adams did not live to see his wondrous literary creation, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, made into this feature film. Maybe that’s fortunate. Each individual component of this movie is well done, from Garth Jennings’ direction, to the astoundingly creative set design (all the good guys sport spherical décor, the bad guys, … Read More

ELF

Poffy The Cucumber

Elven Hell. Will Ferrell is funny. This movie is not. In ELF, Ferrell is Buddy, a normal-sized human raised by Santa’s elves (hence, thinks himself an elf), who is sent out into the world ostensibly to find his real daddy, but in reality to get his clumsy, over-sized bollocks out of the tiny toy factory. In Christmastime New York, still … Read More